3 Ways to Encourage Confidence in Kids: Creating a Growth Mindset

Does your child struggle with self-confidence? Let’s talk about how to encourage confidence in our kids.

What is a Growth Mindset?

Let’s talk about a buzzword: “Growth Mindset” (this is actually Nell’s favorite thing to talk about, ever) 

Why is it all the rage? Because of the new neuroscience research about one’s ability to ACTUALLY grow a brain.

It takes a child from “I can’t do this” to “I am going to learn how to do this.” 

Did you know that doing something you LOVE helps create a growth mindset?

Because when we are doing something that is fun to us we build our brain! We dig deep. We learn all we can learn. We get used to working hard for things that are important.

 

Can We Rewire the Brain?

Dr. Carol Dweck was fascinated with students’ attitudes about failure.

There were some students who would rebound really easily and others that would just be devastated by the smallest setbacks.

Dr. Dweck coined the terms, “fixed mindset” versus “growth mindset” to describe the underlying belief that people have about learning and intelligence.

New brain research has actually proven her theory, that we really truly can mold the brain with experience and we can have new neurons connect and create new synapses called neuroplasticity. 

 

Why a Growth Mindset Matters

Neuroscience proves that we can actually increase our neural growth through our experiences, through determinations, and the actions we take.

We can make ourselves get smarter!

In addition to teaching kids about this malleable intelligence—this literal ability to grow their brains, researchers saw that what teachers or parents practice and how they interact with a child has a big impact on that child’s mindset.

So, depending on the teacher’s or the parents’ feedback with the child, it either encourages the child to challenge themselves and to continue to grow the brain, or to take the easy way out. 

3 Ways to Foster Growth Mindset in Your Home

Parents play a big role in this.

You greatly impact your child’s mindset, how they interact with the world, and the narrative that goes on in their brain. 

The beauty of a growth mindset is that it puts children in control of their life and their future. 

1. Develop a work ethic within your home.

Create a system or expectation where your child is developing a work ethic. 

Why does it help?

A child learns that even though something is not what I want to do, it’s something I need to do, and in the end, I can see in the long term that it’s a benefit to me. In our home, we have a family economy to help with this. 

2. Allow your kids to do things that they love.

Allow expression for creativity in whatever way that looks like.

Give space for boredom—allow space for creativity to start to build so that they can experience deep play. This also helps them develop their passions.

If they develop a brain that has strong skills toward a passion, then they have also developed a brain that is used to working hard for things that are important to them. 

3. Praise Effort.

“Praise” has a bad reputation because we as parents have a tendency to praise the product of something rather than the process that it takes to get there.

Focus on effort rather than product. 

For example, when your child shows you a picture they’ve colored, instead of saying, “What a great picture! You’re such a good artist!” Try “Wow, I’m very impressed with how hard you worked on that picture!”

For the child, rather than labeling themselves “I am smart,” or “I am dumb,” it helps change their attitude to, “If I fail, that’s okay. I can just put in some hard work and things will get better.” 

 

Growth Mindset Vs. Fixed Mindset

Symptoms of a Fixed Mindset

  • A child who really desires to be smart or have a high intelligence
  • If something looks difficult, they avoid the challenge
  • They give up easily, and they don’t take feedback well

As a result, they may plateau and then not realize their full potential. This confirms a deterministic view of the world and the thinking, “things on the outside are in control of me.”

 

Symptoms of a Growth Mindset

  • The desire of the child is to learn, rather than to be smart
  • The desire is to become better
  • They embrace challenges and find ways to learn lessons in their mistakes
  • They are persistent when they have setbacks
  • They are determined and as a result, they reach a higher level of performance

It gives them a sense of internal control over their lives. 

For more examples of how to practice a Growth Mindset vs a Fixed Mindset, download this free printable!

If you want to learn more about a growth mindset, these are my favorite books on the subject:

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