Have you ever wondered why your child is behaving a certain way? It can feel exhausting to repeat the same corrections or to see the same habits over and over. However, with a few simple strategies, you can create a positive shift in their behavior. Here are four ways to help your child’s behavior improve (while still showing them love!):
1. Begin with Something Positive
When your family is gathered, say three positive things that are happening before addressing a behavior that needs correction. For example, you might say, “I love how everyone is sitting at the table,” or “I’m so proud of how you remembered to wash your hands.” By the time you get to the third positive statement, you’ll often notice that the problematic behavior has changed on its own.
You can also do this one-on-one with a child who seems to be struggling. Look for and point out the good first to build connection. Your child will feel seen for their strengths, making them more receptive to your guidance.
2. Ask Questions
Instead of telling your child what they should do, try asking them what they think they should be doing. For example, if they’re playing with toys when it’s time to clean up, ask, “What should you be doing right now?” This encourages self-direction, a skill that is wonderful for practicing problem-solving and responsibility.
When a child identifies the correct behavior on their own, they’re more likely to follow through. It might take some practice, but over time, you’ll notice your child becoming more independent in managing their actions.
3. Insert Fun
Let’s face it—some tasks are just plain boring. Even you as an adult might not want to do them! If your child’s behavior is struggling with a specific task, make it more interesting! Can they walk to the exit while walking backwards? Or can you give them a choice, like organizing blocks by color or stacking them in a specific order before you put them away? If there are a few things that need to be done, try asking in which order your child would like to do them.
Offering playful options or introducing a twist makes the behavior itself more engaging. Kids thrive on creativity, and turning chores into a game helps reduce resistance! Something as simple as cleaning up with the song “The Floor is Lava” will show your child that even the less exciting parts of life can be approached with a sense of fun and imagination.
4. Be Patient with Teaching Again and Again
Repetition is a normal and necessary part of learning, and the same goes for teaching your child good behavior. Be willing to teach the same lesson more than once, trying different methods if needed. I mean, how many times has your dentist reminded you to floss? Even adults need repetition to be reminded of what they should be doing!
If you model correct behavior as an adult, your child will follow your lead. Stay patient with them, praise the areas they are doing well, and remember that learning is a process.
How to Transform Your Parenting Long-Term
These are just four simple ideas that will make interactions with your child better on a daily basis. If you want to learn more about the foundation of positive parenting, get my audio course, “4 Parenting Principles That Make a Difference in a Day,” on sale until 5/13 for 50% off! This will teach you four principles that will transform your family life and how you parent your children. It not only has actionable strategies, but also it shares brain science and it is full of relatable stories, laughs, and tears. YOU can make a difference in your home. Start today!
If you would like other ideas of how to start with positive parenting, you might like these posts: